So my ex, who popped up at the beginning of February, pursued me for dinner plans, and then disappeared when I finally said yes? Popped back up again yesterday with a “Wow, sorry to disappear! Life got crazy!” message.
Here’s what we know:
- I don’t want to get back together with him.
- He broke up with me, so there’s a strong chance that I’m more convenient than compelling, for him.
- I’m not angry with him— I’m open to being friends, but I’m not sure that’s a sensible option for either of us. Especially given how flaky our “friendship” appears to be. And certainly, he seems, when focused, more like he’s courting than being a friend.
- Representatives from my IRL crew want me to impose a “no more single-guy friends” rule, because they think I waste time with flirty friendships instead of pursuing something with actual potential.
- I think this is an extreme position, but I can’t deny that I waste a fair amount of energy with romantic-esque relationships with guys with whom I’m not ever going to be seriously involved (or at least, guys I know I’m not interested in dating based on a knowledge that we’re not headed in the same direction.)
So my question is this. Do I even answer the message, at this point? I would normally answer it because I don’t want to be rude, but I’m not sure that it’s a good idea to keep feeding this, given how little energy I have for the things I actually want.
Vote early, vote often!