Ow Ow Ow Ow Ow

Here’s the lesson I’ve been learning this week:

When I’m in pain, I need to factor that into what I expect of myself. You would not believe how stupid was the fall that resulted in my bruised tailbone. I was coming to a dead stop and lost my balance just as I was almost stopped, and fell without ceremony onto my butt. It was not a spectacular wipeout. And so I feel like it shouldn’t be affecting me. But it is. It hurts a lot, pretty much all the time, unless I’m standing still or laying down. I have a hard time sitting down, standing up, walking or bending, just to name a few. The level of pain is just below the threshold that would bring tears to my eyes the whole time I do any of those things, and it’s been going on now for four solid days.

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ISO Better Angels

Yesterday was a challenging day. I took over this week’s Toastmasters meeting because I was concerned that it was looking like a dumpster fire, and when the TM was confirmed to be MIA, the only person who stepped up would have been a newer member than we encourage for TM of the Day, and she’d have been a first-time TM. A meeting like this would be a baptism by fire, and I don’t want a new TM to have that experience, if it’s avoidable.

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Still Got It!

Over the weekend, I hit the gym. I tried to quit the gym awhile ago. After I got the dog, my primary way of exercising was walking him, and after we moved into the house, I felt like going to the gym was taking time from my responsibilities at home. So I went in and told them that it just didn’t work for my life anymore. They told me I could pause my membership for six months and see if I still felt the same way. Boys and girls, this is a trick, and I knew it, but frankly, I love to work out and take classes and swim indoors and I didn’t want to quit the gym, even though I wasn’t going. To me, it’s kind of a symbol that my physical health is a priority commitment for me, and the idea that I wouldn’t be investing in it at all made me nervous (whether it should have or not) that I’d backslide dramatically. So I paused it. And after six months, I started paying for it again. And still not going.

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Update: Lenten Facebook Fast

Almost immediately after I posted yesterday, Facebook started sending me emails. “A lot has happened since you last logged in!” “Your contact posted!” “Look at all these notifications you’re missing.” It’s interesting to me. I have blamed myself for turning to it in every quiet moment or every moment when I’m wanting distraction, but it’s clear that what I’ve heard about them thinking hard about how to get and keep your attention every second is true. And to the extent that I can recognize that it’s a proactive plan to steal my focus and keep me hooked, I think I may find it easier to resist, going forward.

Can I Buy a Vowel?

I swung by Applebee’s last night on the way home from church. Mom didn’t go to church, as is pretty frequently the case these days (about once a month she manages it, opting out because she doesn’t want to take the chance on the weather, because she’s too tired or not feeling great, or because she was too tired to take a bath etc. on the day she would have had to do that for her not to feel gross at church), and we used to go out reliably afterward. Because I go to choir practice for an hour before church and then sometimes run errands after church, my cooking on church nights can result in our eating pretty late, so if she’s not with me, I get takeout from a restaurant we might have chosen.

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